Star Wars Study, Case #3: Bibbe Rhodesian

“You see this girl. What’s her name… Ron… Rye… Rey! That’s it! Rey, like my late Uncle Rey-Rey. Rest his soul.”

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“Can you believe she’s in that new documentary about war the between The First Order and The Resistance? She’s practically a celebrity now, with having The Force and all. I just wish that she would’ve come into the boutique to see me first before she ran over all place in those butt awful rags I gave her a light-year ago.

(whispers) You know she’s an orphan right. Poor thing. She was barely out of her training bras when she came into my boutique, Couture Creations by Bibbe — I specialize in the finest couture creations in Jakku. Anyone who’s anyone on this planet shops with me because I’m the best, obviously. Anyway, the girl walks in just filthy, covered in sand, hair a mess, tore up from the floor up. She looked as hungry as a wookie at a human barbeque. I could not deal. I asked her where her folks were. She said that they just basically dropped her off in the middle of the desert and said they’d be back.

What kind of crazy shit is that to do to a child?!

daisy-ridley

So, I do my good deed for the day, feed her and clean her up. I make clothes for sophisticated grown-ups, so I didn’t have anything for her to wear. I grabbed an old t-shirt and rummaged through the strap fabrics I had left over from my Nomadic Sand Goddess collection that year, which was the talk of the desert by the way.

Anyway, I found enough to throw together some capris, but it gets super hot on Jakku, and the girl is as white as a Storm Trooper uniform. So, I got the last minute idea to drape her in the fabric that was left and wrap her arms with bandages from that first aid kit I never used. I gave her something to wrap her head with for the sandstorms and heat, but those hideous goggles she had on, child. Those had nothing to do with me. I would have burned them and buried the ashes. They’re that hideous.

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Despite her terrible sense of style, I’m quite proud of Rey. I offered her a place to stay and a job in the boutique, but she chose to go it alone, just in case her folks came looking for her…(long awkward pause). But now, look at her. She’s famous! I’m sure I had a tiny part in her becoming a star and all. I just wish she would’ve worn that same outfit for so long. It’s tragic. I just hope she has a stylist now. If not, tell her to call me.”

– Bibbe Rhodesian, owner of Couture Creations by Bibbe, Jakku.

Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2015)

 

 

 

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